Sweetheart, your back

Ho@##@.
Relieved . That they returned my other half . And honey, youre just as lovely as you were when they took you away. Well, u cant help it, But when was the Govt known to do something which justified both urgency as well as common sense. And why the hell do they have that hopelessly incompetent Shivraj Patil there? When almost everyone had decried his acceptability long while ago. Or is Mrs. G really deaf. She anyway seems to hear only herself.
So thats an incompetent bugger trying to protect our great country from terrorists. And what does he do? Remember Bush in Farenheit 9/11. He just sat there moving his jaws. Pretending to continue reading the story to some school kids. As though there wasnt anything else bothering him!!. And then Mr. Patil, he puts on his golf shoes, and does the most wierd thing imaginable (and must I say the easiest).
For you, Ill do this, Im not voting next time either. After all, the great Indian democracy cant throw up someone who can atleast protect it from bloodshed. Im growing sick of even talking about it.
When are these old men going to comprehend that well things have to be done at times. And if not them, who else. Or is power only about the perks it brings you.
Well anyway, you're back. and thats all I carre about.
just thought about the Ronan Keating song 'If tomorrow never comes'

Now What?

Some years ago, well, not that long ago, but when Centre court at Wimbledon had not yet been mystified by a sorcerer who would later be their most familiar guest and known as Roger Federer, the King of grass, Pete Sampras was asked, “Now what?”. More than 11 Gran Slams in an era where competition was taken for granted, and proving himself the genteel surgeon on grass, that would be a question he would have prepared himself for. The reply was philosophical. “When you have reached the top of a mountain, what can you do but descend”.

Years later, now, well into retirement, when his prematurely ageing legs are almost sure to fail him, he might be realising that had he lingered a while more, he would have spotted a young Swiss slowly trudging up another mountain, far steeper and higher than his.

Roger Federer still hasn’t reached the summit of Mt. Impossible. That is the stuff of dreams. But he’s a long way up there, and more importantly, he’s on the right mountain.

Maybe, you may say, Roger doesn’t have a worthy rival. No Agassi, no Ivanisevic, no Becker or Lendl. But then, wait awhile, his so-called competitors are in no way lesser to those in the past decade. We’ve seen Roddick and Hewitt play tournaments of enviable tennis. And then they come to the last frontier.

The last four Gran Slam finals Federer played, you couldn’t say he wasn’t challenged. No, they, Agassi, Baghdatis and Nadal proved that the man was mortal, and not carved out of a Greek legend, as was rumoured to be. They pinned him to the baseline, made him sweat, forced out marginal errors and tweaked out a set from the master. And then, when the world started to relax, satisfied that at last, they could now watch a match along with elegance rather than simply elegance on the last Sunday of each Gran Slam, there was the angel turned into a ruthless killer, who killed, because he had nothing better to do, and ruthlessly, because well, for all you know, he was feeling hungry. Agassi, 6-1 in the 4th, Baghdatis, 6-2 in the 3rd, and Nadal, 6-3 in the 4th. And the dream final melted down to a no match at all.

Now he struts around Centre Court. Well, why shouldn’t he? After all he bothers to religiously take the long trip there every year only because they wouldn’t deliver the trophy to his home, wherever that is.
He wears a blazer while walking on to Court. And nobody complains. Mike Bryan, king of a parallel world explains why. “One, because he’s Roger, and two, because he’s such a humble champion”. Humility. A king’s rarest quality. And that’s what he is. King, on court. And simply Roger off it.

So now, back to the question, Now what? Well, Sampras had 8 Slams when he was 24, and we know how long he took, and how many obituaries the rest of us wrote before he reached his fourteenth. That Federer will meet the same fate seems to be a distant possibility, but then, sport continually astonishes us with what everybody calls as reality and who knows what his stars, that is, if he has stars dictating terms, hold. And we have hope in the form of a young Spaniard named Rafael Nadal. One rivalry Federer’s not particularly relished, at least till Sunday. Two finals on the trot. A win each. Each winning on their most favourite and losing on their least favourite surfaces. Now we can wait and watch them negotiate on turf that promises to be neutral, the hard courts of the US and Australia. Hopefully, next year, by the time they lock horns on clay, we will still not have arrived at a clear answer. Maybe, though God forbid, he would simply have gotten bored and started trying out squash, to go along with some modelling. Or maybe, the Mallorcan would have run away with this rivalry.


If none of these happens, the AELTA will do well to retire the prize money for the Wimbledon champion, and engage some of the best Japanese scientists to create a machine that will do to a tennis ball what a Rolex watch does to time, and mind you, no less; Then, they can consider playing two tournaments, one for the runners up trophy, to be awarded to the best of the 127 remaining, and then one for the champion, Roger Federer, who will match his wits with the machine.

And I think I already know who’ll win!

Shashi Tharoor, and some patriotism

Shashi Tharoor. Hey he already sounds like hes the Secretary General. So diplomatic and all that.
"The world would benefit from a wider array of choices" and "Pakistan also has a right to field their candidate"
Bullshit! Thats what. Why does Pakistan have to be so jealous about such a big neighbour making it big. We didnt clamour when they got their guy to head the ICC. And the arguments they put forth. Even the BJPs explanation of Sonia Gandhi's sacrifice two years ago wasnt as pathetic. Ho, politics is funny, diplomacy wierd. But often it gets tiring..
We know that. They know that. They know that we know that. And we know that they know that we know that. But still the game goes on. For the minnows, they need to prove that they are around. For the stalwarts, its to prove theyre still around. Whatever, it never seems to rise above 'that'. And we, fools, hang on to their every word, skip coffee to be the first to read the print version of yesterday nights news.

Now Shashi Tharoor. He's sensible. "Theres no point in visualising a UN which antagonises the US". And what could be more true. He's got guts. To say the same in a country where some commie dictates what the Prime Minister can say and cannot. Yeah, hes not another run of the mill.

And what about India? Do you think we needed this elevated position? Yes , we do. And Arundhathi Roy, Im sorry, but Id rather India be seen as a (nuclear) power. If not for anything else, simply for pride. Maybe just like Id like to see us win the world cup (no, not in football- because that would mean four years of waiting wasted). But its a feeling that could do a lot.
It is Americas national pride thats helped them set and reach such high standards of living. That Hum kissi se kum nahin! And the only way to emulate that is by acting like we are the best. Yeah we deserve a place in the Security Council. Atleast we dont spend time biting the corners of a Made in America towel like the guys currently out there do.

Proud, Arrogant, Loser, whatever the hell you feel like calling me.

Do I need to be a professional, much less a CA? Well, do I really need to be a white collared professional who gets others to do work that he himself hates? (Id better qualify that. In India, here from seing things, its all about doing somebody else's dirty accounting and auditing when youre still a student and after youve passed that stage, get some other unfortunate student to do yours. Maybe its not that obscene, but my explanation's pretty close. And about hating the work, I know CAs who claim they hate being one. Sadly I dont see them doing anything about it.)
Anyway, back. Must I? Do I really have to have some three lettered word after my name on my visiting card? I can promise you BCom wouldnt find a place there. Im too proud for that. Do I need to have that air conditioned room in my own office where Im boss to be taken seriously in the social circle. God. Do I care?
Well, the answers negative. If my happiness will be dictated by a fear of what society will take me for(and while were at that, a society that doesnt really care!), then somethings seriously wrong. After all its my life. One small life were all trying so hard to prolong as far as possible. Why the heck should I spend my time doing something I detest? Only thing is Im too young to foresee how miserable my future may become if the plan doesnt hit base. Ok its a risk. and a risk Im more than willing to take. So Im a freak, lost in fantasy. but Id rather be that way. And after all, the only way you can judge me will be at the end of days.
Yes, we've heard too much about dreams. from the mouths and pens of people who havent really risked or put everything at stake to make that leap in the dark. Yeah its nice to read about inspirational people. And its marvelous to listen to people who say these stories. But thats all it is as long as were not willing to risk everything for that which we truly want. And I wasnt satisfied with the way I was till last week.

And I dont wanna be alone

You get used to being alone. But break that once, and youve gotta get used all over again. Says Bach in his book Illusions. (Now thats a book you could read, if you already havent, though I cant assure you you can retain all of your sanity)
That why do I, how is it that I always end up alone feeling. No matter how many friends or relatives we have, or how close they are to us, there is an aloneness in all of us. Well, were not neccessarily alone. But we feel alone. That no one else thinks the way I do. No one sees things or has the same attitude towards things as I.
It could be that everybody sees things the way I do. But I dont feel it. So again Im alone.
Or it could be the child in us. Never satisfied with what we have. And, I believe, we dont have a damned right to be.
Again, it could be because of the uniqueness in each of ourselves. We are all unique. Just like everybody else. What we expect from relationships. And this is what sets us in the quest for more. The quest for someone just like us. The perfect friend. The perfect friend does not have to be perfect, only perfect for you.
Whether this pursuit will turn out to be futile, ask me after, maybe, well i dont know how you can ask me after I die, but, if you wanna know, try.
But whatever, being alone is disgusting. One of the few (and there seems to be many instances of those few) when you wish you were back at home.
And I dont wanna be alone


The song 'Alone' by the Beegees was a favorite of mine. This post has glimpses of its meaning as explained by Barry Gibb.